A man walks into a bar with a cheese sandwich under his arm. “A pint of Guinness for me and the cheese sandwich,” he says to the barman.
After a heavy night of drinking at the local bar, a drunk stumbles into a Catholic church and slowly makes his way into the confessional booth. There, the priest patiently awaits the man to begin his confession.
Dave and Andrew walk into a bar. Dave says, “Hey Donkeyboy, get me a drink.” The bartender gets him a drink.
Dave says, “Donkeyboy, get me another drink.” The bartender gets him another drink.
Finally, Andrew asks the bartender, “Why does he call you Donkeyboy?”
“I don’t know. Hehaw-hehaw-he always calls me that.”
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, “I’ll have a pint of blood.”
The second one says, “I’ll have one, too.”
Q: What’s the difference between West Ham’s goalkeeper and a taxi driver?
A: The taxi driver will only let four in!
Q. What’s the difference between West ham and a teabag?
A. A teabag stays in the cup longer.
Q: Whats the worst thing about Upton park?
A. The seats face the pitch.
Q: What happens when the opposition cross the halfway line at Upton park?
A: They score
Q: How do you make a Hammers fan run?
A: Build a job centre.
No-one likes to see such a great club like Liverpool down and out, and fighting for a place in the Europa League next season (Well maybe a few Everton and Man Utd supporters do!) So obviously we don’t like to see Rafael Benitez in such a bad state, and we won’t be taking advantage of their situation, will we? OH YES WE WILL!
Have a few very funny Liverpool jokes, and try not to laugh too much LOL!
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There’s something regarding bars with drunkards that appear to be the most common cause of jokes. Everyone has found out a funny story that begins “A chap walks into a bar” (and says Ouch!) and there is no doubt that drunks are usually extremely entertaining. So listed below are a couple of pub jokes that you may not have heard previously, however they really are all awfully witty, I assure you!
Chelsea News