How to Bite Like a Vampire
Vampire lore has been circulating around the world for centuries and people continue to be fascinated with the possibility that they do in fact walk amongst us in the dark of night. Movies like Twilight and television shows like True Blood romanticize vampire living and have brought our obsession with the undead back to the forefront. And the most disturbing and intriguing part of vampire lore has to be their insatiable craving for human blood. But how do know just the right place to bite? Perhaps it’s instinct because you can’t just bite a person anywhere; it requires a lot of skill. If you’re strangely curious or perhaps vampires are real then read on and I will explain the ins and outs of sucking blood like a pro.
First you’ve got to narrow down the bite location. If you want to be efficient, then you’ve got to find one of the major arteries. This will give you the most blood in the fastest amount of time. The aorta is the best artery for this. It is located behind the breast plate and a deep bite will undoubtedly result in death. The second best place for blood sucking efficiency is the femoral artery. It is located on the leg and is easily accessed on the upper thigh. Again, your victim is not likely to survive such a devastating bite. If you are a kind vampire and would like to avoid murdering your victim, then you should aim for veins rather than arteries.
Now if you are really just looking for a quick blood fix and you have absolutely no intention of killing off your victim, then you can’t be too greedy. Never drink more than roughly four pints of blood. Any more than that and your victim will need a blood transfusion in order to survive. When carefully picking out your next victim, you don’t have to be concerned about blood quality. Whether the human is Type A, B, AB or O, the blood will taste roughly the same. It will have a copper or metallic flavor because it contains iron. The only substance that might slightly affect the flavor is alcohol consumption, but even that is barely noticeable. However you may still want to avoid picking up chicks or dudes that are hanging out on bar stools. Well there you have it. Bite responsibly and please try to be a compassionate vampire.
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